Crossroads, in a literal term and the very concept of collating them to my life eluded me for a long time. Never had I been put in such a situation where I had to decide, a decision that weighed down my future. A wrong path and I would be propelled to a hedge, the right path and I would just be one step away from success, however that is defined! I did get myself across these make-believe crossroads, these are the guidelines that helped me.
1. That relationship isn’t worth it: Relationships aren’t something that should come in the way of your productivity. They were never meant to be. Through the ages, however, women have become more outwardly then just managing the house and foraging for food (shopping for groceries, these days).
At times like these where women are at par in all the fields, it’s natural that they require equal care and attention in relationships as well. But what often happens is that they become the center of the universe. And when they are, then any decision that is taken is always biased. Which would mean that the hedge is your last resort!
Stay clear of such relationships, although candlelight dinners, flowers and anniversaries are important, it shouldn’t make up for the entire day. What you put into a relationship should pay off, not monetarily, but intellectually. Your partner is your “lego”! He/She is the one that support you on your dream. Don’t let them hinder your choices. These are the ones that stay. Hopefully the ones that end with a ” Happily ever after”!
Remember a happy relationship is always one in which there’s mutual support.
2. Be finicky with the choice of friends: As much as chivalry is important in friendship, sometimes it’s best to be finicky! Being particular about the type of friends can get you a long way in life. A negative friend will always have something bad to say, and nothing is worse than negativity when you face crossroads in life, it’s the time where one needs to be precise and an instinctive need of support is always fulfilled with the right kind of friends.
As much as I can I say about friendship, will always be insufficient, because of the fact that friends are defined in a unique way to everyone. Which reminds me, the first time I said I had written an article, and that I had taken an oath to write three articles a week to my friend, she was very happy for me, and she read the article, this very article before it was revised and was frank in saying that it wasn’t the best of me. And that made me thinking. And I took it in a positive way and re-wrote this article. To a few, that much of straightforwardness would have sounded demeaning, but to me it didn’t. It all matters on how you would wish your friendship with someone to be. Like Paul Walker’s mother rightly pointed out that Vin Diesel needed to be consoled on the loss of his better half. Vin broke down when he visited his friends funeral! We all miss you Paul!
3.Parents do matter: Twitter and Facebook might have gotten us together with long lost friends, although nowadays it’s been flooded by the Meme revolution and the numerous photographs of cats. [Like]
To the contrary it has brought a canyon of solitude between the immediate people that matter. Parents. I know very few friends who were willing to teach their parents how to use Facebook and were actually not bothered by the care and security they provided. Most of our parents don’t know how to use a computer or a multi-touch input device. And having the knowledge to master these simply do not provide us with the wisdom to overrule our parents. Technology is new to them. No harm done.
Ultimately in life we realise that we are alone, our life is our struggle. An up-river battle through the many problems that want to wash us away, friends may come and go, girlfriends may break up, wives wanting divorce, colleagues plotting the revenge for the extra credit you got from boss, everyone will want to pull you down. But there are two people who would support you on their shoulder, no matter what your age. They are our beloved parents. They want what’s best for us. And please heed to their advises. Much of them come from their heart and the wisdom they gained through the lives they lived!
4.Beauty isn’t actually skin deep: As much as I would love to argue that this is the 21st century and beauty is no longer related to success, the very fact that the technological advancements have rendered us too complicated to have the time to be understood, deters me in adhering to the age old saying!
People simply don’t have the time to look through shoddy clothes to be able to determine that you truly are a talented one. Interviews require you to look sharp because of this simple fact. A well mannered and well dressed man shall be successful in his field. Character matters as well. It’s a seesaw, beautifully balanced. Dressing sense and character put together form a dashing personality and we all know that it is the epitome of an educated man in this century! So dress sharp and appropriately to be taken seriously.
Quick tip: I learnt my skills by reading a lot of blogs and websites and by taking excerpts from all the people whom I thought looked dashing! It’s a start!
5. Sub-goals all the way: It’s nearly the end of thanksgiving when I write this, and I tell you, however delicious that turkey seemed it’s impossible to have the entire bird at one go. If such a simple task is impossible then the dream of hitting it big is also impossible isn’t it? Not exactly. Turkey, small chunks, happy thanksgiving. Similarly break your biggest goal or your ultimate aim in life into smaller doable chunks for the months ahead, and break them into even finer chunks for every week. By doing this, not only will the sense of accomplishment for the week will overwhelm you, it will help you endure the herculean task of turning that dream to reality. I use Sundays as my time to think what I would want to accomplish for the week ahead. And Saturdays to reward myself.
Remember that rewarding yourself is a vital part of this overall plan.
Although these advises may seem to be straight out common sense, putting them to effect can be strenuous and if done right they prove to be rewarding!